A View From Above

SIM Graduation

2010-10-04T13:18:00.000-07:00

COO John Stroili is graduating his SIM class today in Atlanta. SIM is a national CIO conference that brings together IT executives from all across the country to discuss pertinent industry issues.

The class features many activities designed at improving the attendees as functioning business people, as well as tackling issues that are facing multiple participants on a daily basis.

Congratulations John!

An Ode To Larry Goober

2010-08-20T04:54:00.000-07:00

"They call me big meech"
"Larry Goober"
"Eatin Lunch"
"Not eatin tuna"
"One Sandwich"
"One spread"
"Taste Real Good"
"With some Wonder Bread"

Coming from a kid who always need husky sized pants in grammar school Goober was the shit. Pictured above if I did this correctly, this jar plus one spoon plus 4:30 power ranger time after school and I was set man. Kids fucking riding their bikes to the park and shit,, nah i dont need um. I just would post up with goober and go num nums till mom came and said i was going to spoil my appetite, which at the time was ver unlikely to happen.

So its been sometime since my last blog and I do sincerely apologize. Like the Gremlin's jerry curl, i feel that this blog is something that grows on you after sometime of seeing it in action. Like a flower blossoming in the early morning, or Hurb Grover suckling the morning dew after he wakes up after a night of ambien and nyquil.

So spent last weekend DTS and let me declare that there is no better vacation spot int the world. Alot of fairfield hurbs and hurbettes talk up the boogy hamptons as the spot to be, but i disagree yessiree. DTS has it all. Great food, scantily dressed women, boardwalks, clubs, bars, and fried cheese balls.

Anyway have to do some work work now so ill check back in with ya later.

And no one talk to Mike Gorman today. He is soooooo hungover

DTS NBD

2010-08-09T08:03:00.001-07:00

This blog is being written not from my office but from the back porch in Mantoloking. Sorry for all you burbs who have to read this from your cubicle, or playpen if your Kutz.

So real pissed off at ESPN this week. Between the bogus farve coverage, and the fact that they are suckling from the LBJ power teet and refuse to print anything negative about him.

Had a near death experience yhesterday. Seriously I was out pretty far swimming in the ocean and almsot didnt get back in. I was getting tired treading water, and almost didnt make it in. Thankfully the crackman is partially amphibeous. I can swim like a goddam barracuda and was abke to bring myself to shore, huffing and puffing the whole way.

brought my girlfirend to work on Friday. Got to see the place of work for the crack man and my cheetos stash in the supply slash snack closet.

bout to go on a bike ride down 35. Like I said... DTS NDB!!!

Get some crackaas

Looks Like Someone's Got a Case of the Tuesdays

2010-08-03T06:49:00.001-07:00

Good morning loyal followers and such. So todays blog is going to encapsulate a few things ranging from my Friday night in NYC with a confederate, a few fairfield floozies, one cart food man who had me tempted to pick meat up off of the sidewalk and shovel it in, a near death nascar turn, a sick new sport i invented, a three course meal, and an analysis of generation y. It will be broken down into two, possibly three parts. I would suggest setting aside at least ten minutes to read this one, and then maybe a good three or four hours to comprehend the information actually stated.

7.30 - Part I
Bo mal arrives at my house approximately seven o clock, attempts to return dirty sweatpants he stole, puts on his farmer shirt, and away we go. First stop train station bar. An out of character and most likely disoriented bo mal actually pays for the more expensive shot while i sloothly pick up the tab for the two beers. Just to put this in prospective, you have a better chance at getting a 20% tip from an Anne Frank descendant than you do at Bo mal flashin the green at the bar. But thats neither here nor there.

While the much talked about but never fully understood "OB" group was underrepresented in NYC (individuals going down the shore, Grover resorting to communion money, Tieds continuing to live on fantasy island and Neville doing what ever it is that they do behind the cloaks and large beards) flashes of greatness occurred. Team buckets was spotted with a substantial group of JPurbs (JP Morgan Hurbs**) at the Frying Pan, and accompanied bo and I down to the meat packing district. (The gay joke here is below me.. but fuck you anyway Spadawitz. Im gonna bank on you not even seeing this because your too simple.) After a few rounds, some nice surprise faces inside the bars, and some all natural American spirit ciggarettes my mind had reached the point of no return. I couldnt keep up with the constant stream of Fairfield faces, and made the executive decision to catch the 1:35 train, pulling bo away from a potential lay that he had as much of a chance at closing as I do being a fucking foot model.

Too make a long story short, got the cart food which attracted little one like a nat at a barbeque, dropped most of it, and missed the train at penn by about 5 minutes. Proceeded to get in a cab and drive up and down I-95 like we were filming an Indian, Southern, and CrACkdenish version of the Sopranos. This made me very upset. I voiced my displeasure with my cab driver but was able to avoid any racial slurs that could have led to a phone call to Nevill's cousin that would have had us both face down in the meadowlands. This wouldnt have happened had we been able to get a ride in a limo with a benicio del toro look alike. Forgot who told me that story but dont worry girl who im refering to.. female classiness and standards are a think of the past right?

To be continued...

A Day Late and a Dollar Short - A blog dedicated partially to Patches O'Rourke

2010-07-28T13:06:00.000-07:00

Dear pigpen,

Saw a Delaware license plate that said Kaboom yesterday. Pretty cool. Thought of you and mixed feelings came to mind. Ont eh one hand you are a jewwy friend who takes my clothing. On the other hand you are a delta sky miles member who grants me with guest privileges and early morning bloody mary's.

We can live in the past and reflect upon all of our experiences with smatches but why waste our time right? Fuck that noise. Lets turn our attention to another flamboyantly gay Fairfield alum.. Hurb Grover

Fun Facts about Hurb Grover
1) Enjoys talking about himself in the third person
2) Enjoys talking about non consensual sex with women in the third person
3) Enjoys talking about his self proclaimed nicknames / shitty breakfasts in the third person

I should stop making fun of him now though. I think he is one of the like seven people that read this blog. So for all of you who made it this far, exciting shit going on in Stamford. On Monday a drunk homeless man wandered into our office with a sixteenth of a bottle of majorska. He became combative, and we had to use brute force to get em into the elevator. It was pretty wild and required police activity.

While the suspect would not state his name, forensics tests on the jerry curl proved it was actually araina. She was deported back to Willy wonka's chocolate factory after a brief stay in Uncle Mitches stamford shag pad

Internet Checkers

2010-07-20T13:20:00.000-07:00

today i played a game of Microsoft internet checkers. I would have to say that like the second or third thing I did when I first got a computer was check out the games section. While checkers wasnt on Windows 95, it is on all subsequent editions. Aside from the increased adult entertainment options brought to us by a computer, we have these fuckin cool little games that maybe one day these 2000's little porkers will play with an actual set of cards.

anyway point here in internet checkers was on cutting edge of technology. click on it and instantly your playing checkers with a guy from the other side of the world. Today, my game consisted of me vs an arabic individual... fucking making world peace with this shit.

now another crazy ass concept is internet checkers doesnt have a full chat feature. It only has like a dozen or so different pre determined phrases that you can use, plus a happy and sad face. this eliminated the dangers of people who get visited by Chris Hanson other than the graduating class of Fairfield University 2010.

On this subject, how the fuck does Chris Hanson make any sense. This is Fairfield's like last ditch effort to really drill home that do as we say not as we do thing (as in, be a good jesuit but dont play with the altar boys). So yea, maybe in that respect it makes sense, but still,there could have been some other people to bring in who could have brought more to the table there. Personally, I would have loved to see a Jaude Claud Van Dam appearance there instead. I mean, guy fucking won Bloodsport. Def beat the fuck out of Chris Hanson.

Filtyness

2010-07-14T10:28:00.000-07:00

Good afternoon ladies and gentleman. Sorry for the slight delay in my blog. I am so fucking busy sometimes it crazy. Mad people be hittin me up being like yo you coming here or yo you doing this. By nah man.. i do it all for the kids like Trick Daddy

So today's blog is not going to be a rhyme that sounded like somone on mushrooms wrote it. Rather, today's blog is going to be about the downfall of mid-season all star events.

Lets run down all the major sports and stupid Nascar. Nascar is dumb and if you like it there is a good chance you also like your cousin too much. If you like hockey then your either James Colline or Canadian, or Johnny Pizzas but he likes anything as long as there is BBQ sauce on it or tiesto playing in the background.

The pro bowl is a joke. I mean how can you have a sport built on intensity and violence and then tell players to go play a game but not take it that seriously. You really think that those sumo wrestler sized lineman enjoy being in Hawaii sweating out enough water to quench the thirst of Ghana? No. So yea I dont know where I was going with that but the pro bowl is stupid.

The home run derby is stupid. While we are there, fucking Chris Berman is a spokesperson for Nutrisystem. Lets transtion here because this is going to get fun. Top five dumbest (fictitious) endorsement ideas

1) Steve Tufo - Big and Tall Shops
2) Brendan O'Malley - Any sort of mens retail clothing or personal hygene company
3) Phil Spada - Anything except the special Olympics
4) Charlie Grover - Shell Gasoline
5) Mike Gorman - The Squat Rack
6) Billy PR - P90X

So yea home run derby sucks. It was better when everyone was all juiced up and just beating teh fuck out of the baseball. Now guys like Jamie Moyer are still getting people out. I mean.. Im pretty sure Jerry Schneider's GPA is higher than Moyer's top speed.

Yea well I have to go prep for a meeting but this one is gonna be cut short. Ill check in later around 4 ish.. ill drop some more knowledge on ya then hurb

Ode to the Keurig Coffee Man and other Awesome Inventions

2010-07-07T13:33:00.000-07:00

Tired and sleepy in search of energy
where do I go, to the energy tree
I dont have one of those by me
My eyes are closing, this means I cant see
I walk down the floor, down the hall I mean
and i stumble upon Mr Keurig.. and his coffee machine
I ask Mr Keurig if he likes Charlie Scheen
He looks befuddled, wonders aloud "what do you mean"
He hands me a cup full of hot steamy Joe
THEN IM BACK LICKETY SPLIT.. HEY WHAT DO YOU KNOW
Mr Keurig.. I proclaimed in a real loud voice
the people of America.. they have a choice
they have a choice to vote, a choice to look and listen
they have a choice to step forth and emerge their kitchen
with fresh hot coffee and a croissant to spare
i say there is awesome shit...everywhere.
From the magic bullet to clap on lights
to etch a sketch, and the old Light Bright
To wireless internet
and cell phones that do anything
and plato and putty
and even pink silly string
there is awesome shit all around
just dont forget to look up and down

Crack

Hurby K

2010-07-02T09:09:00.000-07:00

Good afternoon Hurbs and Hurbettes. This blog is dedicated to Hurby K,.

Last night I decided to go to alive at 5 after work. Hurby K ended up meeting up with me for one drink. One vodka tonic and one jack and coke turned to 8 and soon we were making friends with everyone and urinating in public garages, seeing whose stream would roll further down the pitched ramp.

Continuing along on our night, we bounced from bobby v's to blackbear and back while listening to old 90's bands. Having a very good night, we decided it would be best to meet up with some friends, and spend the night in Stamford. Hurby K made a pretty good arguement about staying local so I agreed. then we had to go and move her little hurby car from the lot. On the way we stopped for a beer and in her words "tonight is going to get sloppy"...

Because it is almost one and i am leaving work i am going to stop here. I might continue on Tuesday, but probably not. Moral of the story is dont trust her alone in Stamford... she thinks with the wrong half of her body.

Crack

Shit that Bothers Me

2010-07-01T12:33:00.000-07:00

So today i am going to write my blog about shit that bothers me. If you are one of the six or seven people that read this, dont do any of these things around me because it bothers me

1) If you have a blackberry and I have blackberry dont fucking text me. Hate that shit

2) When you open a cheese single while **** and you accidentally east the plastic wrapping (happens more on white than yellow)

3) the Keurig machine makes the coffee too hot

4) People who insist on breaking when the light is green

5)Ariana Michaloutsos

6) When I put my pants on and they dont fit

7) If you send an email with a read receipt, and someone reads it and doesnt answer.

8) Not having meatloaf on Tuesdays

9) Having to get up an pee in the middle of the night

10) My boss

11) Slow internet connections that obstruct "me time"

12) Shitting in the office and walking out and having someone else or boss in there

13) People who lift with improper form

14) Spilling coffee on my shirt first thing in the morning.

15) People who respond to stories with either "really" "no way" or "you've got to be kidding me" but mean it and actually like want an explanation.

16) People who say "what" pause, and then respond to you.

17) Being behind a slow walker

18) People in Stamford who smoke a black and mild at a restaurants.. like come on

19) jajajaja instead of hahahaha

20) Bananas with brown spots

21) spinach

22) The fact that no one actually reads this

Alive at Five

2010-06-24T13:31:00.002-07:00

So today marks the first concert of the annual live at five summer series. I will be attending. Now for those of you who read this blog not named Kelly or Kim,this means shits gonna be fucking bananas. Im talking hotel bans, overturned tents, uprooted street signs, whole nine. Actually not really. I have matured as a young flourishing adult, and have every intention of staying under control throughout the event.

Anyway. so what the fuck else is up. Really long tennis match, Italy is out of the world cup, and I invented a new type of shitting int he office. I call it "Remove your S before you S". I believe it is much More comfortable to take your dress shit off before you sit down, especially when you have a tie. This eliminates the chance of any shirt and or tie to seat contact. I love office shits. I mean its like 15 minutes of uninterrupted you time.

O and props to the duuuds ballin out this morning. Gonna get real big errr Thursday morning with them, and bring my hibernating abdominal muscles to fruition in some time. gotta stop with those mid night eats though. I mean for no reason I got out of bed around 2 and had a plate of chocolate cake. I mean lloyd banks said get the cake ***** but not sure that's what he had in mind. Anyway time to go get bombed and piss off my girlfriend.

Stay thirsty friends.

Crack

Back in Blog

2010-06-23T04:48:00.000-07:00

So after finding out that Kelly Mahon has a twitter account (the words fine and ugh dominate 98% of it) and impetus from her, I have decided to return to the blogging world. I been had blogs. I been had snacks. I've been bloggin since you kids were getting finger blasted at the Sadie Hawkins dance so just be ready for the things your gonna read here. Today my plan is to get big at the office, then get big and lift at lunch, then get big and eat an nice smoked ham and provolone sandwich.

Thats it for tdoay. Consider this an appetizer to wet your pallet for whats to come.

JC

Come Network in Stamford!

2010-06-15T13:43:00.000-07:00

A vital aspect to being a successful business is the relationship’s built between current clients, prospective clients, and people you meet day to day. You never know who you’re going to meet and any one person can open the door for you or for your business.
Building strong relationships is an excellent way to expand your professional circle, being that each person works in a different industry, allowing you access to various businesses.
In regards to professional relationships, it’s all about quality, not quantity.

Attending networking events is extremely important for employees. Tomorrow, I will be accompanying one of The TNS Group’s Account Managers to “Beyond The Recession”, a small business breakfast and networking opportunity. Joe Connolly, A WCBS / Wall Street Journal Reporter will hosting a panel discussion on how to grow and increase your sales after the economic downturn. Confirmed Panelists include, Wendy Caplan-Carroll, a Constant Contact New York, Joshua Crandall, the founder of Clever Commute on Metro North, David Lewis, President of Operations lnc. Human Resources Outsourcing and Consulting of Stamford, and Mitchell Grossinger Etess, the CEO of Mohegan Sun.
This networking breakfast begins at 7:30 am and ends at 10 am. I think the networking hour will be very beneficial for the attendees. It will give them time to meet other business owners and employees from the Stamford area, being that it‘s at the Stamford Hilton. Hopefully this event will create some opportunities for new clients in the Stamford area.

Stay tuned for feedback on the “Beyond The Recession” Networking Breakfast

Tara McKenna

Studying with Johnny Pizzas

2009-03-16T02:28:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone. BAck at ten thirty the next morning studying for that Garden Design Midterm. Its alot more difficult then you would imagine, so stop laughing at me. School here is kinda a joke, but now that its mid terms week, we all are forced to remember that this study abroad program is actually not a four month vacation, but some sort of educational experience. Actually, i take that back. This is a type of school different then any other I have attended thus far. We dont just sit in the class room, but rather absorb the world around us, and become educated culturally. While I cannot say I have added some useless math equation to my general knowledge, I can say that I have learned to appreciate the things around me, as well as enjoy the beauty of Florence. In America, we tend to move too fast with our heads down and our minds solely on the final goal. I.E. Let me study really hard to get an A then forget everything i learned after one hard night of boozing. No. Here it is different. Here everything is slower, and here everything means something. In the smallest alleyway, art can be found, and the little corner shop might just have the best sandwich you've ever eaten. So take my word for it and slow down a little bit back home. You might just find something you never realized was there. And johnny pizzas says cia to everyone reading. He is my friend.

Hello

2009-01-09T09:05:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone. Due to school and work commitments, I have not been able to keep up with this blog as much as I might have hoped. However, that is all going to change. I will be traveling to Florence, Italy, and intend to chronicle my exploits overseas. Think of it as a Fear and Loathing type trip, minus the ether, adrenaline, and salt shaker. I intend to stay in a hostel, fly in Amsterdam, and drink so much wine that my pee pee tastes like grapes. Be sure to stay around and follow me as I bring American to Europe!!!

Newspapers are dead. NOT

2008-09-26T14:37:00.001-07:00

A quick little post here before I leave work and get going on my weekend exploits. I take the train into the city two days a week, and have noticed a reoccuring trend. Granted, newspapers are slowly moving into an almost completely online industry, the abilitiy to get the news for fifty cents and keep your self occupied on a train is something that will never go away. Almost half of hte people on the morning train have a paper in their hands. There's just something about that smell of coffee and fresh newspaper ink that gets epople going in the morning. Nothing substancial here, but a worthy observation none the less.

Welcome to the Real World

2008-09-12T13:38:00.000-07:00

On Wednesday, I started working at a Public Relations/Marketing firm in the city called the Rosen Group. As soon as I found out I had been awarded this internship, which was only about two weeks before I began, I couldn't wait for it to start. I viewed this as a chance to escape the college life for two days a week, and get on with the rest of my life. The internship is nothing less than I hoped it would be. I am immersed in the public relations culture, calling companies, measuring online data and inputting it into an excel spread sheet. Despite my overall excitement, I came to a stark realization as I was crammed on the Metro North Train at 6:54 A.M: Fairfield is an absolute country club compared to reality.
My two years at Fairfield have been what I thought were hectic, stressful, and an overall hassle in many respects. My first dip into the concrete jungle where I will hopefully spend the majority of my professional career has quickly decimated that original view. Pressure to get work done, being a novice in an office full of veterans, and not having a sure idea of what your doing but doing it anyway have been my routine throughout the workday. I am in a cab at 6:45 am and do not arrive back on campus till after eight. This grueling schedule is not only draining physically, but also financially.
In the past three days I have learned that no matter what happens on the Fairfield campus (aside from power tripping resident assistants and glorified mall security officers better known as public safety) it is a cake walk compared to what awaits us after our final walk down the graduation aisle.

Look Everyone! There's the recession

2008-08-21T11:03:00.000-07:00

As a member of a collegiate news media corporation, I am quick to stand behind the society of journalists as one that stands boldly in the face of a tyrannical democracy and does everything in their collective power to learn the truth.
But not this time
A quick glance a a morning paper, a daily news program, or trendy car advertisements will have you hiding your piggy-banks quicker than McCain can declare war. But before you go yank everything out of the market and throw it in the bricks, think about who it is declaring this economic downturn, as seen on site such as this
They key to the growth of the currently slumping economy lies in the pockets of the people. Every dollar spent is one more dollar freely flowing from one hand to another. Once easy spenders are now clamming up on day trips to the mall, vacations, and any major or minor purchases from electronics to the morning grande late. Their irrational impetus for this is the balding heads and make-up overloads blaring from the television.
The broadcast media must realize that they are currently the number one catalyst for the countries economic woes. Quarterly losses, chapter eleven bankruptcies, and jobless Americans have been gracing the screen for months and have caused a widespread financial panic. Instead of always being the dark cloud, highlight some of the gains certain companies have made, the progressions of alternate fuel technology and the strides being made by NASA.
Well NASA is actually a galactic black hole in the national budget, but that's neither here nor there.
There are plenty of thriving, hard working people in the country both young and old that are doing more than holding their own in this supposed economic slump. Let's stop being so starved for news and not run that "What YOU Need To Do To Survive" type program and put something out there that this country is undoubtedly in need of; Confidence

JC

I Rock Fairfield on Two Wheels

2007-10-08T18:03:00.000-07:00

Ok so here's a quick question to think about before you read this. Have you noticed how warm it has been out lately? I bet you went home for the long weekend and brought back some cold weather clothes. Unfortunately for you, its still real warm out. Catch my drift yet? The world is getting warmer because of all the CO2 fumes reeking from the mufflers of your all wheel drive, 8 cylinder sport utility vehicles; a.k.a house on wheels.
Now I'm not an environmentalist or anything but I want to know why I'm getting such weird looks from stuck up students when i zip past them on my 21, yeah thats right 2` speed Schwinn bike. Stop hating! My bike gets me anywhere i want to go no campus in under five minutes. It does wonders for my acing ankle, or leg if your Doctor Simon, by providing me with a low impact form of transportation. I can throw my books in my bag, strap my laptop around my back, or throw some stuff in my pockets and be anywhere i want to go before you think of some corny line to say to me when you see me unlocking it.
But the fun doesn't stop here. I take my bike all over the place. I take it to the bank, to CVS, and even to Stop and Shop when i need a few things. When i ride, i always have the right away, never have to adhere to traffic laws, and burn fat instead of the human money pool known as gasoline. You know what else is nice., I never have to do an extra lap around campus looking for a parking spot. My bike is always right outside my door, mere steps from the foot of my bed. And parking tickets, umm last time i checked they don't get put on bikes.
So maybe next time you see a red streak shooting around campus, you'll wave and let me go rather than point laugh and rip some exhaust in my face.
But honesty, I don't care what the hell you do, cause all that money you keep flushing down your gas tank, ill be laughing as i ride to the bank of America and watch my checking account rise like the gallons, and dollars you beg to slow down on the nearest gas pump.

Ride a bike, or take a hike bitch

Life??

2007-09-28T09:58:00.000-07:00

Ok so I have slacked off a tab bit with this blog stuff, but never again. Anyone who knows me can tell that i have been handicapped for a long time now. My right foot has two bones that are fused together and will prevent me form ever being an athlete again. This unfortunate event has given me a new prospective on life in general. It has taught me that people take two many things for granted in life. What would happen if one day you woke up and realized you could no longer walk. Or what if one day you didn't wake up at all, as in the case of our recently deceased classmate. Be positive about what you have in life. When you think that everything sucks, and wish for luxuries unnecessary to your existence, think of someone who would die to have your life. Life is good; and if your not living on the edge, your taking up way too much damn room.

What Should We Be Thinking About Today

2007-09-11T10:08:00.000-07:00

I find it ironic how two of the music industry's biggest stars can pick today of all days to pit their simultaneously dropping albums against each other.
Six years ago on a Tuesday morning the world saw one of the most horrific acts of terror take place on American soil. The war was brought to us with a thundering force no one thought could be used against America. As a majority of the country came together in morning, another large part turned their ears away from church bells and into headphones blaring one the two newly dropped albums by Kanye West and 50 Cent; "Graduation" and "Curtis."
In the land of bling, making it rain, and rims on cars, the subculture of people who idolize this lifestyle and place it before the reality they exist in are showing their true colors. Fans watch closely as 50 cent threatens retirement if his album is outsold by Kanye West. But does it really make a difference.
2,752 people died six years ago. 2, 752Mothers, fathers, teachers, friends, husbands, and wives left this world. Sorry if I don't find it important if one rapper leaves the game.

--- Joe---